2012 going into 2013: home. probably asleep before 11pm. I had just finished chemo/radiation treatments. I was back at work, thankfully working from home, but still struggling to get through the day without a nap.
2013 going into 2014: same thing. Sensitive to crowds and loud noises, feeling like I survived the first year of recovery and feeling too vulnerable to be out late at night.
So when I decided that we would go house-hopping for new year’s eve this year, my daughter was surprised. We hadn’t stayed up this late, other than our occasional movie nights at home. For me to have endurance with more than one audience in the same evening was a new experience for both of us.
We were able to enjoy family and friends and bring in the new year with lively energy. We arrived home safely, in the 40-degree version of a Los Angeles winter. Warmed with vanilla tea, homemade tamales and banana creme pie, we reminisced on the unexpected wow moments of this past year. We came home after 1am, with a new memory of how we celebrated new year’s eve.
This experience is a marker of healing. I really felt that the Lord turned around my previous holidays, as Proverbs 10:22 reads, “The blessing of the Lord, it maketh rich, and headdeth no sorrow with it.”
He showed me that He really walked with me through the new stages of healing this past year. Psalm 1:3 reminds me that the Lord gives me due seasons, “And he shall be like a tree planted by the rivers of water, that bringeth forth his fruit in his season; his leaf also shall not wither; and whatsoever he doeth shall prosper.” The Lord gave me these memories right on time and when He provided us with opportunities to bond as a family, He didn’t hold back.
There were many times last year (ha, I can say that now) when I felt like I wasn’t enough and I felt like I was falling behind on too many things. Even with my episodes of doubt and discouragement, the Lord walked me through those moments and reassured me that I could trust Him. And tonight, I really saw the the reward of His grace. God gave us a rich life with simple things.